Week 21 - Blackjack!

Hey there stalkers! Baby Boy Joiner is back for another week of blogging fun. This is week 21 - or as daddy has been calling it, "Blackjack Week"!

He's calling it that because he's an idiot. Mixing babies with gambling? Good move there dad. Those are two worlds that really need to merge together....

Before I get started, let me just say THANK YOU to everybody out there that voted on the Twitter Poll last week. I didn't want to "tweet". I've never "tweeted", and if you HAD voted for me to do that then Placenta would've gotten all cocky since it was his idea. But now I can take the polls results back and tell him that he's as clueless as daddy for suggesting it! Let's face it - Twitter is for nerds and obsessive/compulsive people. I don't need to be lumped in with that kind of crowd.

Its been a busy week for sure. I finally let you guys know that I was a boy back on Tuesday, daddy's been working a ton of overtime, and mommy's in her full-blown "nesting phase". Now that's busy! Fortunately I've moved into a nice new phase of my life where I'm getting more and more REM sleep. Remember how I told you I started dreaming? Well I realized that dreaming is pretty cool so I'm doing a lot more of it.

I had a dream a few nights ago that I was the first baby to finish the Disney Marathon. Then I dreamed last night that I was playing football for the University of Florida. Pretty cool, huh? I've also noticed that sometimes dreams just don't make any sense at all. How else can you explain Monday night's episode where I was swimming in a huge pool of Jello and being chased by hundreds of hammerhead sharks made out of gummi bears?

Come to think of it, mom HAS been eating a lot of sweets lately. Thanks a lot woman! Because of your incessant snacking I'm now forced to dream of a world made of candy. Just for that I'm going to make you crave a mixture of broccoli and spaghetti for the rest of my time in here! Curse you and your nonsensical eating habits!

Enough about HER though, lets get back to ME! I'm growing big and strong as you can see by my latest pictures (check the right side of the page for the new ones). Mom and dad were a little nervous going into the last doctor visit, so I decided to calm them down. (Don't think I'm going soft here - I wanted them to calm down so mom would let me go back to sleep!) As soon as the ultrasound lady started poking and prodding her way into my world with that infernal device, I gave them a "thumbs up" sign to let them know everything was fine in here.

Then I started striking several modeling poses. I think I did a great job posing, but that ultrasound lady is NO photographer. Absolutely NO creativity whatsoever! You've got all of THIS to work with, yet all you can do is take these prison-mugshot-style pictures! For the love of all things baby-related woman, have you no creativity? I've seen better pictures in Helen Keller's photo album. There ARE some pictures of my baby parts but I won't be posting those just yet because I have to censor them a bit. I don't want everybody out there getting jealous.

I had to work EXTRA HARD to bring my personality across in these pictures since this lady had no idea how to work with a model. So what did I do? I showed them my baby feet so they could tell I was going to be a great runner/football player one day, and then I made a little gun sign with my hand. Now I COULD tell you that I did that to show off just how cool I am, or to say that one day I'll be an expert pistol marksman, but that would be lying. That is my signal for BABY WORLD DOMINATION! True, there's not that much to dominate in here, but I own this place! That means you too Placenta! From now on, YOU work for ME!

BABY WORLD!!!!!!!

Whew, sorry about that. I got a little excited for a minute. Lets get back on subject here.....

To sum it all up in one little paragraph just doesn't do it justice, but lets just say the doctor visit showed us just how AWESOME I'm going to be. Every test came back fine, no problems whatsoever. The ultrasound showed a healthy heart, stomach, kidneys, you name it! It even showed my little baby bones which are good and strong. I'm still waiting for them to turn into stainless steel though. They're a little slow with that.

The best part is because daddy's put in a ton of overtime this week, mommy and daddy are going to use that money to make an appointment to go to one of those 3D-4D places and get some pictures and video so you can see in better detail just how good I look. I just hope the people at that place are better photographers than the lady at the hospital!

Lets take a quick look at the Baby Tale of the Tape. I'm up to about 11 inches tall and weigh about 3/4lb. Just think of how far I'm come in a matter of weeks! And think of how far the DOCTOR has come. She's finally stopped going by the "crown to rump" measurements and moved onto the big-boy height. 'Bout time!

What else is new in here? Well, my skin has gone from transparent to red. Thin, soft, and really really RED. Its better than being CLEAR don't get me wrong, but I can't wait to turn this red into my daddy's skin color. Red makes it look like I just got done screaming my head off or something.

Also, my digestive system is working by itself on a minimal basis, so I'm fairly self-sufficient. Again, all I'm processing right now is amniotic fluid, which tastes like whatever it is that mommy is eating. Right now it tastes a lot like ice cream. A little chocolate, a little mint flavored, with maybe a splash of cake in there somewhere. Its around this time that I start to figure out what my eating habits are, so whatever she eats usually becomes some of my favorite food.

And we wonder why kids have "sweet tooths"!

Alright, lets wrap this up. Mommy is about to leave for work and my internet connection is crappy when we get in her car and go for a ride. Time for a quick baby name poll! Obviously we aren't doing girl names anymore. That is, unless dad wants to adopt the "Boy Named Sue" philosophy and intentionally screw me up for life. This week you might be surprised though! For once I think that mommy is off her rocker with the name choice and, God help me for saying this, but my DAD'S choice might be the better one! Don't let me sway your opinion though, judge for yourself!

Daddy's choice this week is "Jeremy Allen Joiner", and mommy went with the more exotic "Remington James Joiner". If you ask me that name makes me think of two things - a snobby, pretentious guy.....or firearms. Could be really GOOD, or really BAD. See my point there? Anyways, go ahead and give us a vote on those two, and we'll catch up with you next week for some more baby bloggin' action!

Until then, keep on stalkin'!
-Baby Boy Joiner